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In the spring of 2020, I studied abroad in Montpellier, France, with the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. Although my study abroad was cut short by the Covid-19 pandemic, I was still able to spend roughly two months in France where I accomplished many personal goals I laid out for myself prior to my departure. During my study abroad, there were two overarching goals of mine which enveloped all other ideas of my time there – personal growth through stopping outside of my comfort zone, and become as fluent as possible in French during my stay by adventuring out on my own.

The intersection of these goals I set forth was to be found in Montpellier, where I was able to achieve these goals in my brief sojourn there. Before my study abroad even started I committed myself to succeeding in reaching what I set out for myself – I did not study abroad with Clemson University of a popular third-party provider, but I studied through UNC Chapel Hill, with a small group of seven others, none of whom I knew, or had even met prior to my arrival at the Montpellier Airport. Despite all eight of us being in a foreign land where none of us could confidently speak the language, I had decided that I would do my own thing, and put myself out there for a more authentic experience. This started with my home stay with Cécile, my French host mom who was also host to a Ukrainian girl, Liza, who was completing high school in France. At the dinner table where we convened nightly to cheers of bon app, our means of communication was French, and, while Liza knew English as well we stuck to French, despite my occasional plea for vocabulary help from her. This foundation of discomfort and growth was expounded upon when I decided to get involved with locals via the dating scene, which is where I found the true guide to my study abroad and is the reason for its success despite being cut short, Pierre.

            Unlike my fellow exchange students who hung out with other Americans and native English speakers from a variety of countries, I preferred to stick with my romantic interest Pierre who enabled all the personal growth I had, and aided me in reaching my goals. While my courses were taught at both a UNC center in Montpellier, and my host school, Université Paul Valèry, it was Pierre that taught me the most about France, the French language, and the French people. One initial sign of my being in a different culture was the necessity of saying "Bon App(etite) prior to eating every meal. For me at home, meals could be a shared experience, and often were with my family, however this was not a norm I observed with my friends at college. To eat food without making this declaration beforehand was culturally taboo, as I quickly learned when I dug into my salad prior to saying bon app to those dining with me. In this instance I realzed that while mealtime may be a social affair for us Americans, it is not a cultural hallmark. We eat meals while watching television, while working, and other forms of multitasking, and this familiarizes the process, and strips it of the intimacy and sanctity which is so important to the French, who assert the importance of meal time and in doing so, this phrase of bon appetite is a holy necessity, and an entity which separated our cultures, as I swiftly learned. 

            It was with Pierre that my most memorable experiences from study abroad occurred. A native of a small town south of Perpignan, France, Pierre drove me the two hours from Montpellier over a weekend to meet his family and see the local countryside. There, in French Catalonia, I stayed in his mother’s home where she made regional, special dishes for me which I would have nowhere else, and despite an occasional miscommunication, I was able to expand my French vocabulary and speaking ability, for his mother only spoke French, Spanish, and Catalan, of which I only spoke the first. Together they took me to a Catalan grill, whose menu was full of delicious yet foreign foods, and it was here that I first tried escargot, cooked the southern way with plenty of authentic, home-made aioli and smothered in garlic (pictured in the blog). While I admit that it was far from my favorite food, I cherish the experience trying it with locals, as it forced me to try a famous food that previously intimidated me, and I tried it with my French friends and family. Not only was this meal classically southern in the way it was prepared but also the majority of Pierre’s family spoke with thick southern accents and used a more familiar, regional lexicon of French that is not taught in school, and while this was challenging at first, I have them to thank for my level of French, ability to adapt to discomfort, and my slight Perpignan accent when speaking French now.

            The experiences with Pierre’s family certainly made me feel shy and nervous, yet it is this discomfort that forced my growth, and allowed me to achieve my goal of a truly authentic study abroad experience of making friends with local French people and immersing myself.